Today's Joke - 2023 Mega Thread

[Eddyde]

I think it's clear that Santa can travel time and inter-dimensionally.

 

[RJSakowski]

Wait..

2.6 billion children on the planet.
2.6 billion * 0.25 = 650,000,000 Christian children.
650,000,000 / 2 = 325,000,000 stops (average 2 children each)
36 hours = 129,600 seconds allowed for delivery schedule
129,600 / 325,000,000 = 0.000398769230769 seconds per delivery

So, that’s (roughly) a whopping 400 microseconds per delivery.

No problem; lots of time. Which explains how he got 'er done. Without a transporter..

Merry Christmas!
-MK

Right you are. I lost the 25% in the calculation. Merry Christmas!

 

[Gnpenning]

And what about all those plates of cookies? If only one in ten households leaves a plate of cookies, that's still 130 million plate. With only two cookies per plate, that is still 260 million cookies. At an ounce apiece, that works out to more than 8,000 tons of cookies. We know that Santa is taking the cookies because the plate is empty the next morning.

And don't get me started on the glasses of milk.

This is the easiest one to explain.


Cookies and milk is what the reindeer eat for the arduous task at hand.

 

[Inferno]

Y'all should see what Santa did to my toilet after all those cookies.

 

[davek181]

 

[davek181]

 

[Eddyde]

 

[Eddyde]

 

[Eddyde]

 

[Eddyde]