Today's Joke - 2023 Mega Thread

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Mark Twain didn't have a kind perspective on Congress and politics. Here's some:

"All Congresses and Parliaments have a kindly feeling for idiots, and a compassion for them, on account of personal experience and heredity."

“There is no distinctly native American criminal class except Congress."

"Sometimes I wonder whether the world is being run by smart people who are putting us on or by imbeciles who really mean it."
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WobblyHand said:
Mark Twain didn't have a kind perspective on Congress and politics. Here's some:

"All Congresses and Parliaments have a kindly feeling for idiots, and a compassion for them, on account of personal experience and heredity."

“There is no distinctly native American criminal class except Congress."

"Sometimes I wonder whether the world is being run by smart people who are putting us on or by imbeciles who really mean it."
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Patriotism is supporting your country all the time, and your government when it deserves it.

We have the best government that money can buy.

In religion and politics, people's beliefs and convictions are in almost every case gotten at second hand, and without examination.

Men write many fine and plausible arguments in support of monarchy, but the fact remains that where every man has a voice, brutal laws are impossible.

Suppose you were an idiot and suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself.

The history of our race, and each individual's experience, are sown thick with evidence that a truth is not hard to kill and that a lie told well is immortal.

It is by the goodness of God that in our country we have those three unspeakably precious things: freedom of speech, freedom of conscience, and the prudence never to practice either of them.

A lie can travel halfway around the world while the truth is putting on its shoes.
 
verbotenwhisky said:
Patriotism is supporting your country all the time, and your government when it deserves it.

We have the best government that money can buy.

In religion and politics, people's beliefs and convictions are in almost every case gotten at second hand, and without examination.

Men write many fine and plausible arguments in support of monarchy, but the fact remains that where every man has a voice, brutal laws are impossible.

Suppose you were an idiot and suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself.

The history of our race, and each individual's experience, are sown thick with evidence that a truth is not hard to kill and that a lie told well is immortal.

It is by the goodness of God that in our country we have those three unspeakably precious things: freedom of speech, freedom of conscience, and the prudence never to practice either of them.

A lie can travel halfway around the world while the truth is putting on its shoes.
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Samuel Clemens (aka Mark Twain) was good with a quip. I was a little too lazy to cut and paste all of those. Thanks for doing that. It also gives perspective, that there are scoundrels in every generation...
 
WobblyHand said:
Samuel Clemens (aka Mark Twain) was good with a quip. I was a little too lazy to cut and paste all of those. Thanks for doing that. It also gives perspective, that there are scoundrels in every generation...
Click to expand...
I was just adding to your awesome contribution, I have 4 pages of quotes from him, he was the Philosopher of his generation, a great man. Did you know that he helped Ulysses S. Grant so he could write his memoirs while he was dying of cancer so that his family would have a living after he died?
 
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