2017 Archive

[wawoodman]

How do you get down off an elephant?

You don't. You get down off a duck.

 

[Bill Gruby]

Down comes from a goose. Rotflmbo


"Billy G"

 

[ch2co]

Only goose down

 

[higgite]

Duck down isn't a thing, it's a defensive action.

Only goose down

Never goose up?

Tom

 

[12bolts]

Why do we cut down trees, only to chop them up again?

 

[wawoodman]

Why do we drive on parkways, and park on driveways?

 

[RandyM]

One day, 3 men died and went to heaven. "Religion?" God's secretary asked the first man."Jewish," the man replied."Okay, go to room 23, but be very quiet when you go past room 8," the secretary said."Religion?" he asked the second man."Muslim.""Go to room 10, but be very quiet when you go past room 8.""Religion?" he asked the third man."Agnostic.""Go to room 71, but be very quiet when you go past room 8.""Why must I be quiet when I go past room 8?" the man asked.The secretary replied, "Oh, the Catholics are in room 8, and they think that they are they only ones here."

 

[cathead]

Two non-quantum physicists were walking down the rail road track. One said: What's that you are flippin?
The other replied: Smart Pills, wanna try one? Sure. They taste like rabbit turds to me he said. There, See!
You are getting smarter already!

 

[RandyM]

Bob goes to see his friend Pete. He finds Pete in his barn dancing naked around his John Deere. "What are you doing!" asks Bob. Pete stops dancing & says, "My wife has been ignoring me lately so I talked to my psychiatrist and he said I needed to do some thing sexy to a tractor.

 

[RandyM]

What does an air conditioner have in common with a computer? They both lose efficiency as soon as you open windows.