Dumb things you own, and never use

dewbane

dewbane

Michael McIntyre
H-M Lifetime Diamond Member
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I've been making some parts on the lathe by painting on a layer of Dykem, and scratching out some lines with digital calipers. Twiddling the calipers to an exact measurement is kind of tedious, so I began to contemplate using my gauge blocks. I COULD do that, but it seems like a silly use of my time, wringing them together, using them to set the caliper, all so I can scratch some approximate marks that are like 0.003" thick. For one thing, I would have to dig them out from the very bottom of a storage tote. Where I apparently put them for posterior. Uh. Posterity.
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This made me realize that I have NEVER used my gauge blocks for ANYTHING. I have no use for them. I just bought a set, because the history of gauge blocks is pretty cool. Johansson and Henry Ford and all that. Even my cheap B set is accurate to millionths of an inch. It's kind of insane. Plus This Old Tony uses them for such and stuff. I think.

So that got me thinking about dumb things I own, and never use. I had a surface plate that I had never actually used for any metrology. One day, I decided to use it as a lapping plate for something. Then I did some reading about why that's a horrifying and evil thing to do, and I went out and bought a new, bigger, better surface plate, complete with a stand. I made a fancy velvet-lined wooden cover for it, and I used my vinyl cutter to print 'METROLOGY USE ONLY" on the cover. The top looks moldy, because the roof started leaking on it, and it got moldy. (At least all the recycled junk pile materials were essentially free.)

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I have never had that cover off. I have no real use for the thing. Any use I might have for the thing would be served perfectly well by the smaller, cheaper, less ridiculous, but still ridiculous plate I have designated for flattening and sharpening use only.
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dewbane said:
I've been making some parts on the lathe by painting on a layer of Dykem, and scratching out some lines with digital calipers. Twiddling the calipers to an exact measurement is kind of tedious, so I began to contemplate using my gauge blocks. I COULD do that, but it seems like a silly use of my time, wringing them together, using them to set the caliper, all so I can scratch some approximate marks that are like 0.003" thick. For one thing, I would have to dig them out from the very bottom of a storage tote. Where I apparently put them for posterior. Uh. Posterity.
View attachment 419445
This made me realize that I have NEVER used my gauge blocks for ANYTHING. I have no use for them. I just bought a set, because the history of gauge blocks is pretty cool. Johansson and Henry Ford and all that. Even my cheap B set is accurate to millionths of an inch. It's kind of insane. Plus This Old Tony uses them for such and stuff. I think.

So that got me thinking about dumb things I own, and never use. I had a surface plate that I had never actually used for any metrology. One day, I decided to use it as a lapping plate for something. Then I did some reading about why that's a horrifying and evil thing to do, and I went out and bought a new, bigger, better surface plate, complete with a stand. I made a fancy velvet-lined wooden cover for it, and I used my vinyl cutter to print 'METROLOGY USE ONLY" on the cover. The top looks moldy, because the roof started leaking on it, and it got moldy. (At least all the recycled junk pile materials were essentially free.)

View attachment 419446View attachment 419447
I have never had that cover off. I have no real use for the thing. Any use I might have for the thing would be served perfectly well by the smaller, cheaper, less ridiculous, but still ridiculous plate I have designated for flattening and sharpening use only.
View attachment 419448
Click to expand...
Could always use your surface plate as a marking out plate (shock horror) If you are a hobbyist (which I assume you are) I doubt you would ever use it enough to worry about wear on it. So imho just use it.
One thing we all know for sure - you wont be taking it with you to that big old machine shop in the sky.
I've got a fair bit of various bits of stock that I've acquired over the years and some I've had for 30 + years. Saving it all in case I need it for an important job someday and in doing so, always trying to scrounge something else in order to not use the "good" stuff.
I turn 64 in a few weeks and within the last 12 months I've realised (or maybe finally accepted) that every job is important and rather than hoarding stuff I now just use it.
Enjoy your hobby.
Peter
 
I'll assume the OP is referring to things he's accumulated for machining. In light of that I can forego my listing of motorcycles and parts, yard care stuff, old tools and reference manuals (out of date now) and a wheelbarrow of the first dirt invented from when I worked in Quality.
Thus saving the forum servers from crashing.
 
Interesting... I use gauge blocks and pin gauges often. They are handy for setups. My vote for useless tools is for layout calipers. I have a complete set of Brown & Sharpe layout calipers in beautiful condition. I like to look at them. Then I put them back in their cigar box for another year.
 
For tools?

Only tools I’ve ever bought that were “dumb” were the tools with manufacturing defects. Only ones that come to mind is a drill press xy table (import) that had core shift and the top slide wasn’t square to the base and a sheet metal cutter (import) that had the cutter wheel spaced too far from the toothed wheel so its more of a “creaser” than a “cutter”.

Every other tool I‘ve ever bought has a use, even if it was only a one time use. things like the clutch align tool, fuel line disconnects, etc were one time use and are waiting in my box in case I ever have a need for them again.
 
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