# Lies we tell ourselves in the shop



## PHPaul (Sep 24, 2019)

"I don't need to take a picture or make a sketch, I'll remember how it goes back together."

And it's First Corollary:  "It'll only be apart a day, two max."

The arm that holds the idler gear for the lead screw drive can go on 4 ways.  8 if you count the 4 possibilities for the gear itself.

Downside up and bass ackwards is one of them...


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## WCraig (Sep 24, 2019)

"If I just hit it a *little* harder, it is going to come apart"


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## higgite (Sep 24, 2019)

“I don’t need to write down the sequence of steps to make this complicated critical part that I’ve never made before. It’s intuitively obvious to a machining genius like myself.”

Tom


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## westerner (Sep 24, 2019)

"That part should be easy to find. I mean, everybody has this (machine, tool, part, truck, etc.), right?


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## tertiaryjim (Sep 25, 2019)

I'll put all these parts together on one shelf so their easy to find when it goes back together, next week.


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## benmychree (Sep 25, 2019)

OR, D, "ALL OF THE ABOVE"


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## eeler1 (Sep 25, 2019)

This will only take a few minutes.


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## hermetic (Sep 25, 2019)

A quick touch up and a clean is all it needs!


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## Bi11Hudson (Sep 25, 2019)

Applies to any job, not just machining. ?How many jobs sitting on the shelf because I can't remember?


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## PHPaul (Sep 25, 2019)

WCraig said:


> "If I just hit it a *little* harder, it is going to come apart"



Hah!

I do small engine work for toy money.  I have a job parked waiting on a new carb because the customer figured if he tightened that little bolt on the bottom of the float bowl enough, it would stop leaking...


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## cathead (Sep 25, 2019)

Placing parts in order of disassembly is quite helpful when it is time for reassembly .  Sometimes I resort to taking a few photographs
especially if the project involves disconnecting  wiring.


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## hermetic (Sep 25, 2019)

That needs cutting about.....................there!


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## PHPaul (Sep 25, 2019)

hermetic said:


> That needs cutting about.....................there!



A favorite saying I got from my Father:  "Measure it with a micrometer, mark it with chalk and cut it with an axe."

Another, the Universal Torque Spec:  "Run 'er down 'til she strips then back it off a quarter turn."


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## PHPaul (Sep 25, 2019)

cathead said:


> Placing parts in order of disassembly is quite helpful when it is time for reassembly .  Sometimes I resort to taking a few photographs
> especially if the project involves disconnecting  wiring.



Many, MANY years ago, I was learning Model 28 Teletype repair on the job.  The guy that was teaching me was good and I was picking it up pretty well.  I took a page printer apart for quarterly maintenance and laid all the parts and subassemblies out on the bench like an exploded diagram.  

"Good job," Larry sez and handed me some quarters.  "Here, go get us a soda and you can put it back together after we take a break."

I ran up to the soda machine and when I came back Larry was standing there with a s**t-eating grin on his face, shaking a burn bag full of teletype parts.

Took me 4 or 5 watches to put that thing back together, but I did it and it worked perfectly.  I learned more about teletypes in that 4-5 days then I did the whole 4 or 5 weeks preceding.  I bet I could still do it and I haven't touched a TTY in 40 years.


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## vtcnc (Sep 25, 2019)

WIFE: So...you going to stay out here all night?
ME: I just need ten more minutes...


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## RJSakowski (Sep 25, 2019)

PHPaul said:


> Many, MANY years ago, I was learning Model 28 Teletype repair on the job.  The guy that was teaching me was good and I was picking it up pretty well.  I took a page printer apart for quarterly maintenance and laid all the parts and subassemblies out on the bench like an exploded diagram.
> 
> "Good job," Larry sez and handed me some quarters.  "Here, go get us a soda and you can put it back together after we take a break."
> 
> ...


Your post reminded me that I have a teletype terminal sitting in my upper barn.  It's been there for forty years and I had forgotten it was there.  If you ever feel an overwhelming urge to tear one down and reassemble it .....


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## markba633csi (Sep 25, 2019)

Reminded me of the Denzel Washington / Robert DeNiro movie about the navy divers, and the underwater test


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## Bob Korves (Sep 25, 2019)

"What could possibly go wrong?" (in a confident voice.)


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## vtcnc (Sep 25, 2019)

PHPaul said:


> Many, MANY years ago, I was learning Model 28 Teletype repair on the job.


Where are the "what's a teletype" replies?


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## mmcmdl (Sep 25, 2019)

tertiaryjim said:


> I'll put all these parts together on one shelf so their easy to find when it goes back together, next week.



This has to be the truest statement in any shop . I do the same all the time , then can't find the parts OR the shelf .


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## hermetic (Sep 25, 2019)

PHPaul said:


> A favorite saying I got from my Father:  "Measure it with a micrometer, mark it with chalk and cut it with an axe."
> 
> Another, the Universal Torque Spec:  "Run 'er down 'til she strips then back it off a quarter turn."


The universal torque setting!!
I once rang the local Zetor tractor agency to get the cylinder head torque settings  for a Zetor 8011, the guy took a deep breath and said "Tight lad, TIGHT"


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## kevinpg (Sep 25, 2019)

PHPaul said:


> Many, MANY years ago, I was learning Model 28 Teletype repair on the job.  The guy that was teaching me was good and I was picking it up pretty well.  I took a page printer apart for quarterly maintenance and laid all the parts and subassemblies out on the bench like an exploded diagram.
> 
> "Good job," Larry sez and handed me some quarters.  "Here, go get us a soda and you can put it back together after we take a break."
> 
> ...


I used to be a respiratory therapist and my final test was on the ventilator, in this case MA1 (puritan bennet) the kind they always show in movies with the bellows on the pole mounted to the machine.  had no idea when my director was going to test me. 
late one afternoon, got a stat call to ICU and when I arrived, my director was bagging a patient and the vent was disassembled and spread over a bed.
He smiles at me and says "Better hurry up, patient is dying"
i assembled it without a hitch and set up on the patient. and yes, it was a real live paying patient.  
those days are gone, would make national news today with social media.


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## cathead (Sep 25, 2019)

Very interesting on teletype machines!  I used to have a model 15 that ended up at the recyclers.  Anyone remember the model 15?


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## Ken from ontario (Sep 25, 2019)

No-one will notice the hole is crooked, the only reason I see it is because I'm the one who drilled it.


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## brino (Sep 25, 2019)

The biggest lie I tell myself:


> "It's late, I'll put away those tools first thing tomorrow."



Then the following week I wonder where my 1/2" wrench went because it's not in the drawer, and cannot be seen buried under three more projects.....SIGH!

The real question is why do I keep believing it!

-brino


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## MontanaLon (Sep 25, 2019)

It's OK I have a spare here somewhere.


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## jwmay (Sep 25, 2019)

This thing is gonna be like brand new..naw...it’ll be BETTER than brand new when I get done with it.


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## master of none (Sep 25, 2019)

This one I tell my self all the time,just because I'm that smart (never done this before but how hard can it be)


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## savarin (Sep 25, 2019)

I'll just finish this then do a proper clean up.
I'm sure I say this every day.
I'm hoping today is the day.


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## MontanaLon (Sep 25, 2019)

I left it right next to the 10mm wrench.


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## Dudemanrod (Sep 26, 2019)

This is easy no problem!


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## NCjeeper (Sep 26, 2019)

It's pretty tight but I am going to give it just a little more. Snap!


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## stioc (Sep 27, 2019)

I promise this time I'll keep the new workbench surface clear for actual workbench use...unlike those other 3 over there that have 2 ft high junk piled on top.

I think I'm very close, I just need to machine another .005" to .010" more and it'll be a perfect fit. Crap, now it's too loose, how did that happen...chinese junk lathe.

I'll change the speed and put the belt cover back on after this one quick job.


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## brino (Sep 27, 2019)

stioc said:


> I promise this time I'll keep the new workbench surface clear for actual workbench use...unlike those other 3 over there that have 2 ft high junk piled on top.
> .
> .
> I'll change the speed and put the belt cover back on after this one quick job.



Yeah, right.....the belt cover is on the bottom of the pile on bench number 2........or was it bench number one?


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## cjtoombs (Sep 30, 2019)

If an important part/tool falls, it will either get hung up somewhere nearly impossible to access before it hits the floor, or it will hit the floor and roll to the most inconvenient to get to place possible.


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## RJSakowski (Sep 30, 2019)

cjtoombs said:


> If an important part/tool falls, it will either get hung up somewhere nearly impossible to access before it hits the floor, or it will hit the floor and roll to the most inconvenient to get to place possible.



As a physicist, I am constantly amazed by how a falling object can violate the laws of physics.


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## MontanaLon (Sep 30, 2019)

RJSakowski said:


> As a physicist, I am constantly amazed by how a falling object can violate the laws of physics.


Last night I was changing the carbide insert in my parting tool. I dropped the Allen wrench I was using. I saw and heard it hit the floor and then it was sucked through a worm hole to an alternate dimension. Never did find it.


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## RJSakowski (Sep 30, 2019)

MontanaLon said:


> Last night I was changing the carbide insert in my parting tool. I dropped the Allen wrench I was using. I saw and heard it hit the floor and then it was sucked through a worm hole to an alternate dimension. Never did find it.


I wondered where that Allen wrench came from!


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## rwm (Sep 30, 2019)

RJSakowski said:


> As a physicist, I am constantly amazed by how a falling object can violate the laws of physics.


Agreed. I think some law of thermodynamics is routinely violated. How can a part fall from 29 inches and end up in a higher location?
My wife says socks in the laundry do the same thing....
Robert


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## Old Mud (Oct 14, 2019)

"Boy, i'm never going to repair another one of these"  Said over and over.


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## MontanaLon (Oct 14, 2019)

I just need 1 more tool.


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## graham-xrf (Oct 15, 2019)

MontanaLon said:


> Last night I was changing the carbide insert in my parting tool. I dropped the Allen wrench I was using. I saw and heard it hit the floor and then it was sucked through a worm hole to an alternate dimension. Never did find it.


This is the machinist's curse! We learn from professor Jim Al-Khalil (easy search on YT) that the Allen wrench was quantum entangled with the event that launched it. It is both "down there somewhere", and also "not there anymore", all at the same time. The space-time warp near the floor by the bench has "disappeared" some larger objects than an Allen wrench!


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## graham-xrf (Oct 15, 2019)

From my Dada - The only way to feel completely confident about a measurement is to only do it once!


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## Bob Korves (Oct 15, 2019)

I cut it three times and it is STILL too short!!!


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## timmeh (Oct 15, 2019)

RJSakowski said:


> As a physicist, I am constantly amazed by how a falling object can violate the laws of physics.


They fold space, for an indeterminate length of time.
Reappearing when replacements are procured.
Sometimes.....


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